Love your self ......!!!!

This article ... I am putting here after a long time and it's specially for my loved one.... DO READ !!!!

If you can learn to love yourself and all the flaws...you can love other people so much better.....And that makes you so happy.

-Kristin Chenoweth

If you don’t love yourself enough how can u expect others to love or respect you?

The famous dialogue from one of everyone’s favorite movie JAB WE MET “MAI MERI FAVOURITE HU” by super stunning Kareena was just a dialog but one of the mantras for happy life.

When a person one loves oneself he or she will never take anything related for granted. It may career health or anything actually. If you love yourself enough you will always make everything related to your work or routine more interesting. 

One will infuse life in every task undertaken, as the ultimate aim is self-happiness. One will be more serious about health, get more consistent towards everything which results in one’s own betterment. However, people often mix it up with being selfish. 

If you are happy, you can give happiness. If you don't love yourself and if you are unhappy with yourself, you can't give anything else but only unhappiness. Nothing is more important than a healthy sense of self-pride and loving yourself.

When you love yourself more, things simply become lighter and easier. You won’t make mountains out of molehills or give inane excuses. Or beat yourself up or drag yourself down over mistakes and temporary setbacks

You’ll have more inner stability. It is imperative that you don’t accept others definition of your life, but define yourself. When your opinion of yourself goes up then you’ll stop trying to get so much validation and attention from other people.

You become less needy and find an inner stability even when your world might be negative or uncertain at times. The increasing self-esteem and self-love also makes you feel more deserving of good things in life and so you’ll self-sabotage less and go after what you deep down want with more motivation and focus than ever before. 

You’ll be happier, I assure you... Life becomes simpler. Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything productive with it.

Self-love can just make anything frustrating into more interesting. So always remember to take care of yourself. Sometimes we get so busy taking care of others that we forget that we are important, because love begins with you…!

"Matlabi....ho ja jara matlabi.......duniya ki sunta hey kyu....khud ki bhi sun le kabhi....."

LOVE YOURSELF!

Loving oneself leads to positivity in thought

First stand up for your own self rather than expecting others to stand up for you

We become self-sufficient when we address our own concerns and deal with them

and it goes on !!!!

February....I am not having so good memories with this month.  People usually find and get their loved one in this month and I have lost probably most loved person (my Dad) of my life in this month.

Probably that has generated and stored little bit bitter memory of this month in my mind. It's not wiped out even after 8 years and probably I will keep this with me for life time.  Life changing time span of my life.  In one week I was transformed into mature, responsible and independent person from the silly, irresponsible and dependent teenager. It was by force not by choice....such life changing incident can make or break a person.

I was in my teenage just entered into college .....it was probably most sought after engineering college in state with reasonably high fees.... Even when dad was there it was risk that I took admission in such college which was going to hit hard to pocket of my dad....which was not even that deep. Losing him at that crucial time was really hard blow for a teenager ..... strong enough to knock him down.

I am not complaining and I never actually did.  I have inherited so many things from him... that too without knowing... just by living alongside with him. However, I will not say ..... I haven't missed him any time in my life.

Teen age for boy .... is most important phase in life. It's a phase when a super hero dad starts to turning into friend. It's a time when instead of scolding and stopping from doing something new....he starts saying .... go and explore that new world and whenever you need... remember that I am here to support.

But instead ... I have got little bit more than that..... message for me was....Do whatever you want to do..... 

Neither you will get anything ....nor you will lose anything (you don't even have anything to)......
Neither you will get scolded for messing up with hair .....Nor you will get pat on the back for passing out with flying colors on graduation night......
Neither you will have to answer questions on arriving late night....Nor anyone will raise concern on working at office all night.....

I have my own very long list for this..... don't want to pen it down here. 

I was teenager when he left me and I don't really remember any serious talk or advice he ever gave to me. Only thing he told me once that....

It's not the money ....you are earning will make you happy....it's ...how bad you have striven  for those money when you were not earning it ...will make you happy....

Very simple.....yet so meaningful... value of money is relative....and not absolute... value of those few hundred bucks....which are spent on friends for one party is nothing for that friend.....and at the same time so much to a person who is not able buy full meal for his family.   

Silly youngster we are .... never understand value of something until we lost it.... at least I wasn't knowing. 

I can recall each and every small incidents ..... where he shown immense care for me.... and I can also recall that ....each time I have took it for granted.... it's but obvious we don't say thanks to dad for such things..... but then I am afraid that .... I can never be like that ..... 

Be it following me secretly during my first bicycle ride to school.....or running towards hospital by holding me in hand when I have cut my finger accidentally.... Be it playing birthday song in early morning....or gifting me a computer game on each birthday....Be it cleaning and check my vehicle every morning ....or rushing back from office to home on just one single call......

There are so many memories ...... all are good......except the last one.... waiting outside hospital...with uncertainty in air..... staying home with family members for 8 hours listening talks about moving him to some other hospital while knowing that it's not going to be happen. That was not so good memory....that was a bitter one....

Life is still good but it would have been much better if you would have been here to share it me.

No matter how tall I grow.... you will be always someone to look up to.... 

Story of Red Sun Shield !

It's quite unusual title of my blog post but after listening to the same question one more time I thought of penning down this incident here.

Giving you some background information.... I used to drive a four wheeler which is quite old now but very good companion of mine through out all my adventurous journey in Gujarat and near by states. There is one thing in my car ( there are many :p) which is quite eye catching and little bit weird as well. That thing is a Sun Shield of red color.

Everyone seats in my car for first time notice this..... and most of the time people seat in my car are somewhat closer ones so they don't hide their feeling and ask me why this one is of red color ...different from others. And I just smile and say it's just like that I don't care about color that much.

In busy traffic junctions of Indian roads....right when the signal turns red....we can always find a group of people comprising of kids...youth and sometimes older folks...trying to cover you from all your sides to get your attentions...and trying to sell small but cute things some dashboard items... or sun shields etc to the people like us.... who are stuck in the signal ... sometimes getting worried about some meeting they have to attend after reaching office. 

Generally I don't buy anything from them .... but I saw that people used to buy such stuff if the sellers are kids [ May be That's why they employ kids...]. 

I was in really hurry that day ..... worrying about my so many things to be completed after reaching home.... and exactly like Murphy's law my car Tyre got punctured. I left from office very late on that day and it was almost 10:30 so very hard chance to get any easy help from others. 

I have cursed my self for leaving that late and for being adventurous and started working to change the Tyre of car. Fortunately It got burst near a toll booth so enough light was there. Massive disadvantage of working in IT company is they suck your brain in those 8-10 hours job and continuous sitting adds extra fat in your body. 

Hence, an easy job of changing Tyre was taking troll on my body....I got tired soon while removing punctured Tyre and replacing it with spare wheel. I have removed Jack just to know that ....that my spare wheel was already punctured. 

I haven't left with much energy so I seat there on ground thinking that I might have to spend night there only and will have to go near by place in morning to get it repaired. Suddenly one fellow, must be in his mid twenties, came towards me from that booth. He was one of that vendor selling those small stuff during day time.

He asked me "Kya hua bhaiya?" 

I : "Tyre puncture hua and spare wheel bhi punctured nikla".

V: "Ab kya karoge?"

I : "Pata nahi .... ab kya karana hey... subah tak ka intezaar..."

V: "Kuch help karu ? "

I: "Kya karega.... without Kit puncture kaise hoga?"

V: "Spare wheel punctured hi hey ?.... Hawa kam bhi to ho sakti hey..."

I : "Pata nahi....ho sakata hey..."

V: "Chalo dekhte hey.....Shayad ho jaye...."

He didn't wait for my reply and started running....He came up with small hand pump....the same we use to fill air in Cycle Tyre.... I was like .... this can't work.... I haven't left with that energy....to pump air in Tyre of car with that little old hand pump. But to my surprise.... he didn't even asked me and started doing by him self. After working on that pump for nearly 4-5 minutes ..... he was grasping breathe and....it was looking like Tyre was filled with air..... we waited for 10-15 minutes to see if there is any leakage....luckily there wasn't any....

I was really happy......that I just jumped on driving seat of my car.... and ignited it.... that fellow was also smiling....happily waving me bye.....and I left.... I reached home little late but on time....

While having dinner .... I was sharing this incident with mom .... and suddenly realize that I didn't paid him money.... not even asked for showing courtesy..... and he never asked for anything.... he just helped me.... and if he would have asked for 500 bucks at that time than I would have paid....but he never did.

I have decided that while going back from home on Sunday evening I will search and meet that guy. While returning I have stopped my car at the very same place and I have looked around for vendors selling items..... to search for that guy.... finally I have spotted him sitting at side of road. I went there....talked with him and said sorry that I forgot to say thanks and pay to him for help he offered on that day to me.

He was smiling ... and said.... he didn't help me for money...it was for different reason. He just wanted to know and see if he can work on that Tyre.... otherwise nobody let him do that. Now he knows that he can do that with that little hand pump so now along with selling this small items he can open small hut to do that little work and he can do that at night as well. 

I asked him if I can buy anything from him..... he replied that now only two Sun Shields are remaining with him that too with different color as he has stopped buying new ones so that he can collect all money and buy remaining equipment s required for that work..... and now as these are of two different color it's hard to sell it.... He will work in near by hotel to earn other missing bucks....

I asked him if he can sell it to me.... I am interested in buying it if he give me a good deal. He replied "Kya bhaiya...iss me kya deal....koi nahi lene wala mere se ab ye... ." 

I saw him cover....and said him that I can give you this cover only....for these two sun shields. He was like "Chalega.....koi baat nahi".

I sit in the car....with two Sun Shields black and Red.... and gave him cover and left that place. 

The man was my school friend of primary.... I know he recognized me when we meet for first time but didn't tell.... I only recognize him next day.... that cover thing was lucky stuff came up to help me. It was containing those extra bucks I got from my other school friend (from same school) for working on weekend for his firm. I just did that work for having fun and he forcefully gave that cover to me while leaving from Rajkot. I think... it reached to better place.

I have decided to keep these Sun Shields in my car as memory.... sometimes it help me to charge my self and change my thinking from really negative to positive.....

P.S. Next time when I passed through that high way I saw that small hut in corner ...and now every time i pass through I can see that small hut growing slowly....

On a beautiful rainy day !!!

"Life is simple yet immensely beautiful.....it’s all about dancing in the rain..."

                                                                                              (Pic courtesy Google image)

On a beautiful rainy day...Life had conspire a plot for me to unleash the realization that "Life can be simple yet can be immensely beautiful......"

It was lazy Saturday evening and I was resting at my friends place accompanied by hot coffee and a recently released novel. There was some get together at my friends place and everyone was there except me and my little nephew (actually friend's nephew). He was playing with his jigsaw puzzle.

Novel was interesting and the weather was at its romantic best.....It was going to be first rain of the season.... clouds had a mixed texture of dull white to dark grey... I was able to listen chimes like voice of peacock out there.... sun was hidden behind the clouds and was giving silver linings to clouds. Wind started blowing intermittently adding new liveliness to nature’s euphoria. Suddenly clouds started moving to closer towards each other to block the last ray of sun.... tiny droplets of water had started kissing the mother earth.

Tantalizing smell of Bhinny Mitti (wet field) started spreading into the atmosphere. I being an adult and lost in reading novel ....was least bothered about this sudden change in climate and didn't notice beautiful salsa of the nature. But my nephew was delighted at the sight of first rain of season. He has started dancing with joy forgetting everything he was doing. Before I stop him or say anything he just ran out to get himself completely drench in the rain. I was supposed to take care of that little brat so I have kept novel aside and ran after him to get him back inside.

I was shouting at him to ask him to get back in under shelter....and he was completely engrossed into playing in rain....he was over joyed with droplet falling on his eyes which made his eyelids kiss each other.

                                                                                                                                       (Pic courtesy Google image)

Listening to my shouts ....he looked at me and said "Mama" (Uncle) come down....let's play in and dance in the rain... but my adult attitude was stopping me and asking me to ignore his tantrums. I went outside in rain to bring him back but he started playing tricks by running around Zulla (Big swing). I had no choice but to get drench in rain to catch him.

Finally I caught him but while doing this all exercise ... I realized that ... I too love the rain...as much as that little kid did. The feeling of being touched by the purest form of water....can only be palpable....I danced and played with hi in rain...without caring about anything ( not even scold I was going to get from other adults specially my friend's mom ) for getting child again.

Only thing was going on my mind while playing with him was....memories of those old days when I was of my nephew's age. I could remember how much I love this crazy atmosphere and playing in the rain. But I was not able to get that why I did break up with nature for some materialistic pleasure.....why did I forget the incessant beauty this nature offered....

But nevertheless....I was in love ... love with this nature again...rather this time even more... yes…

"Life is simple yet immensely beautiful.....it’s all about dancing in the rain..."

P.S :- Adding something more at the end....something I have read ....long time ago and pasted as status of my FB .... Today FB is reminding me this post as Memory.....

"Kaash aisa hota ,

ki bundon ki pariyan koi aisa jadoo laati,
jisse dhuul ke saath saath,
haathon ki kuchh lakeerein bhi mita jaati.."
 #enjoyinglastrainoftheseason

Inspire

Inspire

Topic given to us as part of this training was "Inspire".

Very first thing comes to our mind by listening this word “Inspire” is the big names Mahatma Gandhi, Albert Einstein, Abraham Lincoln, Amitabh Bachhan etc…

We always think that we get inspiration from great personalities only. It’s really difficult to think that we can also inspire others to do something.

And when we have been told that at the end of the training we have to come with some sort of thoughts to represent our topic… this was the first thing came to my mind. How on the earth we can inspire others?

Then we have decided to use metaphor of “Mustard seeds” to explain that it's not always size or current position that matters when it comes to inspire others. If tiniest seeds of Mustard can give inspiration in so many different ways ….we are over quarter century old people with grown over 5 feet …why can’t we inspire others.

Soon we have started searching for positives sides of those seeds which can be a point of inspiration. And in very little time we have come up with below points…..

·         Mustard seeds are tiny but very important food ingredients....it gives that punch to the taste of food. If you have all other Ingredients but not mustard seeds that taste won't come in food.

·         Mustard seeds are tiniest seeds....but they are very quick grower...and it can grow till 6-8 meter (at times). So it may be small at start but in the end it beats most of competition

·         There is pattern in seeding mustard seeds. It needs to seed by keeping some distance among them. Then only they grow up and give proper return of investment. Same way For organization each employ is mustard seeds. To grow them in tree...proper care is must but along with that little space for each individual required as well.

·         There is one saying in bible  "Have faith of mustard seeds" which explains May be you are the smallest one among the people surrounded you....but if you keep the faith.....and do right things you can out play them

·         Each one of us have so many positive things in us may be tiny at the moment....just like this mustard seeds....but if we take proper care of those little positive things and grow them it....will be grow like a tree and give you....proper outcome.

So by the example of these tiny mustard seeds we have tried to explain that it’s not size or position that matters to inspire others.

Very small acts of yours towards achieving something can also give inspiration to others.

Feeling Happy is our Choice!!

Feeling Happy is our Choice!! 

I probably had one of those bad days at office. After slogging hard for so many years something didn’t came in my plate and went into someone else’s plate. It was tough to digest the fact that the person half deserving than you getting something which you wanted. 

Half dejected … instead of going home (where I live with friends) I went to cousin’s place. Little nephew was throwing his tantrums for going outside for playing with his friends. My arrival was blessing for him and he knew that his work is done. He grabbed his shoes quickly and came towards me to hold my hand and drag me outside.

It was odd evening time when all the kids of his age were at home for food. We started roaming around the play area and found one more kid there playing alone with his Superman toy. Kid was son of the caretaker living there. Soon my nephew and he started playing together with his little toy.

They started making story some sort of skit with using that toy of Superman …. Putting it on slide and catching it at end and making noises. Suddenly what happen by nephew threw it in the air and it fall on hard surface. Leg of the Superman toy was broken and got separated. 

Suddenly so many thoughts came to my mind….how this kid will react will he start crying… may be he won’t have so many toys at his home….how dejected he will feel due to this broken toy. I threw angry glare at my nephew and he knew what he did so he got scared as well. Then suddenly that kid picked up the toy and told my nephew that he has magic glue at his home and he will join this hand again. Soon this will be okay like it was before. And he is also going to get remote control car in next week. Hearing this nephew got smile on his face back.

On back of my mind I knew that glue can join it back but it can’t be same working toy again and that kid knew it too. However, he never dropped his spirit. Then I asked him that who is going to bring that car to you. He just shook his head, gave me a loopy grin and said, ‘It is a surprise. I will have it next week.’

He was never getting a remote control car….but he has such a generous spirit…. that he shrugged away his gloom and made up a story about magic glue and a remote control present so that the other kid would stop feeling guilt-ridden… that he had broken his only toy.

Disappointment did hit him…like it hits all of us…but he pushed it aside…just like we wave away annoying fly so that he could continue being happy.

The bitter fact of life is that we try to chase happiness….sometimes with buying materialistic things like car…home…or some latest gadget. But a five-year-old boy didn’t stops smiling even when his only toy got brake …. That smile taught me that happiness is not a pursuit or a purchase; it’s simply a way of being.

Next morning when I entered office and someone again reminded me of that stuff which affected my mood last day…. Just to tease me. I just recalled that smiling face of kid and told him that I never really wanted it. I actually have something better planned for that time and thank god that it didn’t came to me. I felt happy even while Lying and it was fun to see the face of that other person.

P.S. – My birthday is there next weekend and I am thinking of buying that remote control car for that Kiddo ….to make his lie come true. He surely deserve that in return of smile he brought on my face. 

On a rainy day !!!!

On a rainy day

Just beginning of rainy season and we all are eagerly waiting for first proper rain of the season. Unlike the Mumbai and Maharashtra we don’t luxury to enjoy rain for longer duration. However, the feeling while enjoying the rain remains the same regardless of place.

Ok…so what do you generally do on a rainy day?

Well this question definitely has multiple answers….with different age group….and different work group… opinions will get changed. For me rain what was few year back now it is not the same…. So let’s not get into mind of people of different work group…as it will be bit difficult and lengthy process. 

Let’s see how people’s age affects their opinion about rainy day.

During school life: Rainy day means “Freedom”

Writing from my very own experience…. With the word “Rain” only my eyes get lightened up… how can I forget the joy we used to have on the rainy day in school? Whenever rain get started in morning … I used to pray that it should stay little longer … long enough to convince my mom to not sending me to school. In case if I reach school before it start I used to pray that teacher should be absent …and class attendance should be low enough so teacher can’t take full class….no morning prayers and also period of sports at end of the day. We used to take full advantage of whatever little freedom we get due to this rainy day. List is endless and I am sure you all would have your own memories of school days. One thing was good at that time that….we use to enjoy the rain….without getting scared of getting wet….or getting scared of expensive gadgets or books. Ahhh…crazy cycling and racing with friends across the streets…that was time I miss most… but then school ends and we moved on to more freedom time in college.

During college life: Rainy day means “Love/Friendship” 

Huhh…What can I say about this… Rainy day in college life means party…outdoor games…date with someone special….chai at some road side “tapari”. Feeling of getting wet in rain with someone special….singing songs…so many more things about college life about rainy days. We all love rainy day….we can bunk the class and can stay outside on football ground or in canteen…we can enjoy more freedom. Rainy day in college life…typically depict the freedom from all the rules of life, school, family…and it shows us the new found love and/or friendship in life. 

Story of Working class: Rainy day means “Mess”

Well I have been to above class at some point of time….and right now in this class. I am working and frankly speaking now days I don’t like the rain much. I hate it when it started pouring while I am leaving to office…also it irritates me when it start raining when I am leaving from office. Why rains do have to come in morning or evening…..can’t he finish his business in normal working hours? I hate rain because it just makes mess of everything from traffic to office…from my clothes to brand new gadget. 7 out of 10 people from office will admit that…if they can stop rain by doing anything… they would definitely do that. 

Well I also wanted to write about what rain means to people who are married (forget about enjoyment …damn worried about washed clothes drying in balcony) and also about retired people whose one important activity of a day (of pouring water to some plants in garden) gets cancelled because of rain. 

But my client has just transferred me hell amount of work.... Grrr..... not a angry but need to move on with that work.... :p

Whether to rain or not is not in our hand. 

So let’s not be the crying baby who always worries about everything…..and recall few good memories associated with such rainy day……. After all it’s all about dancing in the rain :).