Anger and Me !!!!

Yeahhh...finally it's time write something on this. So many times I have heard about this from friends.....I have made so many silly mistakes in those moments of anger be it punching a wall...window or breaking a glass in hand. I am not justifying my anger but just trying to be honest with my self to accept it as my weakness. Most of the times or say all the times after few minutes I realize my mistake and try to make things even which was broken or damaged by my anger be it a friends...a relationship or any non-living thing. Hardly succeeded in doing it ...every time I promise my self but then after sometimes I do it again. 

See....we claim to be a strong person in front of people around us....for the world...may be we can try doing in front of friends and parents but then it's difficult to lie to oneself ...nearly impossible. 

Sometimes we act foolish.... when we like someone...like someone more than we should. I am not talking about love.....It's the state of confusion....because when you are in love.... you forgive everything.... and keep on living in the hurt. But when you are not sure of your feelings....it keeps on piling and sometimes frustration come our in burst as anger.

Again.....the hitch here is that right differs for everyone....what is right for me may not be the same for you....and that's where the problem starts. Even bigger problem is the expectations....Expectations are a part of any relations....and they increase or change with time. Sooner you accept and acknowledge this, the better. 

What I feel is that ....It's very easy to be a shoulder when someone is sad.....listening him/her blubbering is not that difficult either. As per me the most difficult part is to make a room for happiness for that person. So if you know that you can't fulfil the latter....then there is no meaning of doing the former. Because in that case you always end up hurting someone in the process.

For the past one month (actually it's true for every month).... I have felt so many emotions....but most of the time it has been anger. Not on others but I think ....I was angry at myself. 

But yeah I am saying this.....there is also true that ....there is no room for regret in my life. I haven't regretted anything I have done so far......which I believe was my correct thing to do. I believe in autocratic democracy ...you are free to give advice but decision will be mine and...then I will take the full responsibility of my actions. 

But again here.....what makes me angry is when people forget.....forget the fact that you are human. ....Just like them....and also you can be sensitive....may be not for most of things but for something. You may get offended for that something....even may be by the smallest of thing....then I expect the other person to understand your anger.... Because what I believe is that Anger comes where there is love....there is care....I can't be angry at some random people....but than most people overlook the fact.....they become defensive....and that kills the understanding. 

Sometimes we feels that .....Life teaches lessons in a harsh way. And also it's a fact that we don't really know what's happening in others' lives.

It is also true that.....when I am writing about my stupid emotions here.....in some part of the world.... someone would be praying....praying to save a dear one's life.... someone would be waiting.....waiting for help after meeting with a horrible accident.... someone would be celebrating....celebrating a success at career......also someone would be happy .....very happy because the girl he loves just said yes (lucky boy)..... and someone must have lost a huge assignment still fighting to start a life again. Someone may be trying to sleep and someone may trying to wake up.

You know what.....when the worst possible scenario chooses to be in your life.....you wake up every morning miserable.... and want to yell like a hell - why me. But there is not answer....whether you chose it... Or it chose you.... In any case it's you who has to fight with this. It's a Fight within yourself.....To keep convincing yourself that you will have good days too. Until then..... try to look for the you.... that's gone missing.

If you are lucky enough then you will get it and.... If you get that....help me to know where to search... :)

Have a rocking life ahead :)

Mentors....

Had thought about writing something on this long ago but was not able to put to gather respect in words. It's just that every time i sat down to write, i felt paralyzed. Where should i begin? every time i started to write something, i'd read over it and it didn't seem right. So i'd tear it up and promise that i'd start over again the next day. But one day just kept turning into the next and then , too much time had passed.

I would like to start the post with a short story.

"It was hostel canteen of an engineering college. As it was semester end examination time everyone was busy preparing and discussing exams,subjects and course content. Karan was one of those student present in the canteen. But he was lost in some thoughts. He was thinking of skipping semester end exams with a fear that he was not ready for it. It's not that he has not read anything or he was dull. But he just came back from home completing last rituals of his dad. He was brilliant student and had learnt the whole subjects through out the semester But i would say it was the lack of confidence. He was part of crowd but was lost in his own world of thoughts with lots of confusion.

There was one more person existed in crowd with having thought of skipping exams. He was Ravi . He was having same confusion due to some other reason. Both were sitting opposite to each other busy eating their lunch. Suddenly Karan asked Ravi why don't you have any reading material with you, have you completed everything? Ravi replied in low voice that he was planning to skip exams. He had make sure that no one was listening him. Skipping exam in first semester of engineering was equivalent to crime. Karan replied that he was to thinking on same line.

After completing lunch both them went outside of campus. They have watched movie , have roamed around city and had dinner at some highway dhaba. Both returned to campus late in night. Exam in engineering college is like festival. Most of the students were gathered in single room of friend and were preparing for the exams. These both guys have decided to skip exams so they went back to their room and collapsed on bed.

Aarif was student of 7th semester of same college. He had excellent record in college and already been placed in some multinational. Aarif and Karan were from city and they know each other. News of Karan was skipping exams reached to Aarif next morning. Campus was like home for students and they were like family such news can spread faster than 3G speed. Soon after hearing news Aarif rushed towards the room of Karan. He was still sleeping on his bed as he didn't want to attend exams.

Aarif had woke him up and asked him to wear shirt and follow him. In engineering college campus seniors gets more respected than Professors. Without arguing much Karan joined Aarif with puzzled look. It was 9:00 and exam was scheduled on 9:15. Aarif have rushed towards the exam hall with Karan. He had drawn 2-3 pens out of his pocket and asked him to attend the exam and write down what ever you know.

As soon after reading first question Karan was like yeah...i know bit about this let me write it down first and then second and third. He had completed paper with a great satisfaction. He has attended almost 80% question. Same was the case with other paper. Karan has completed the semester with B+ grade and completed his engineering with same. He is now working with some very good company with handsome package. It was due to Aarif. He had mentor Karan on right time. When on the other side Ravi didn't get that much needed mentoring . He had skipped the exam and went in depression. He didn't completed his engineering and lost somewhere in the crowd of unemployed youths."

The story ends here. But there are many Karan's and Ravi's are there but very few Aarif's. It's important for every Karan's to get mentors in form of Aarif's.

I too have many mentors in my life (touch wood). I have always been lucky to get someone to mentor me as and when needed. Be it school, college or company.

Many time i have tried to cry when i couldn't take it any more. But they have helped and taught me to get back and roar....

I would like to mention their initials....( ab,db,sv,no,tp,ht,hp,hb ,nj,mg,hc.)

Thanks guys to be there for me.... at some stage of my life.

[Note - Article is republished here, it has been already published in my older blog- http://time4masti.blogspot.in/2013/05/mentors.html ]

Book review - Half Girlfriend

I got the book on Wednesday morning in office. So curious to read much hyped novel but then something funny happened.  I was going to hometown same day and then forgot to take along with me.

I came back from home on Sunday night and then completed it at one go in 4 and half hours....being precise 4 hours and 35 minutes :).

It can be done with novel of Chetan Bhagat only and he is also criticized for that....yes.... because of his simple english. Five Point Someone was the first novel from where I have started reading english novel (yeah...I know...I know.... some of you don't consider him as English author at all) . And also... it is the new "cool" to criticize Chetan.....without even reading any of his books. If you are on twitter and following him then you must be knowing it.

Enough about background. ...let's come to the point. ...his latest novel .... 5 point someone. ..3 mistakes. ...1 night....revolution 2020.... he has something to do with numbers....1/2 girlfriend.

Yeah...without any doubt his latest novel "Half Girlfriend" is most hyped novel of the year and it will be best seller for years.  Mohit suri has already announced movie with it. He is surely a marketing genius, he has played every move correctly for launching of it.

"Half Girlfriend" is story about a rural bihari boy who can't speak proper english but then like any other Bollywood flick... he conquers the world ....but only after his true love is shattered.Then as it is chetan bhagat novel....so it also shows governmental inefficiency....corruption....and social activities. It also shows desire to succeed and internal fire to achieve something. Leaving some really good offer to be with family reminds me a phase of my life. (Actually the thought of half girlfriend from Riya's perspective... also reminds me something :p ).

Packed with cool quotes like....

"Girls never tell you anything straight out anyway....you have to interpolate and extrapolate their responses to figure out what's on their mind"

"An army of intellectual men cannot solve the riddle created by an indecisive woman. "

"I am with you ....that's how I define my good time :)"

"sometimes it matters to me.... unlike your other friends.. .I can tell if something is wrong....and if something bothering you...it bothers me..... I want to know everything about you.....but getting you to talk is like a dentist pulling teeth "

"Learn about girls...or figure it out....but don't ruin it.  Understand? "

It is interesting book....I don't want to add spoilers in this post...so will not share anything about story. I will only say that I liked it....more than normal like because many incidents reminds me about my life .... :)

All in all, It will make a good Bollywood movie story.

Happy Reading!!!!!